J. Wilder

Something about it makes me think it might work better as a movie than as a story/novel, but maybe not. I do think the first person works well. You might ...

I think you do a good job of getting the reader to clearly picture the scene. I like the characters in HMYOI Huntercombe so far. The girl doesn't seem as ...

This is really long and the paragraphs aren't separated with a line in between each one so if you fix that you'll probably get more critiques. I totally didn't think ...

The showing-not-telling thing is true although I didn't think of it until I read the other critiques. You kind of hit us over the head with the socialite-society thing, but ...

This is a pretty long post so I didn't read the whole thing because I'm tired. What I did read held my attention enough. The only major problem I noticed ...

Since I'm into pirates I like the subject matter of this, but a lot of changes are needed: The first paragraph is way too much telling not enough showing. It ...

It's interesting enough, but I agree with the other critiquers that it's a little hard to follow; the characters aren't really given any introduction. The idea of a school on ...

I’m also actually sort of working on a novel that involves the main character’s sister dying in a car crash (though that’s not what it’s about), so it was interesting ...

The beginning is too cliched, in my opinion. The whole perfect-twin, less-perfect-twin thing is overdone. But it probably annoys me more than most people because I'm a twin. The characters ...

This is a long post so that might be why I'm the first to comment. However, I thought it was interesting. I also like the names, but I noticed that ...

I like it too. You get to know about the characters right away. It's really realistic and it's written in a way that really fits the topic. Also I didn't ...

I really like this. I'm actually planning on probably moving to Glasgow, so it was cool to read something set there. Anyway the character seems interesting and easy enough to ...

I like it. It's interesting and doesn't seem cliche yet (although end-of-the-world stories have a possibility of being that way). The character seems realistic and likable so far. The only ...

Is this the beginning of a story/novel or the middle? The description of the bar was pretty good, but there were some grammatical errors and stuff, which I've tried to ...

I really like the way this is written. I like the transitions between the different sections and I like the beginning part about the glass house. So I think it's ...